Tips, Tricks and Tools every leader needs to know.
Peace and happiness are an ideal state that we want to be in. Unfortunately, according to many researches, humans tend to attach easily to negative emotions rather than positive ones.
In the previous article, we were talking about steps to take control of our own emotions and our own destinies. In this article, let’s dive into more tools which will come handy if negative emotions arise from situations, which involve disagreement, argument or even misunderstanding.
“Never let your emotions
overpower your intelligence”
Regardless of the kind of emotions, you always have a choice of action. Emotions are a bit like weather report, they are important to know, understand and consider. They should not act like captain of your flight plan or override your life.
When the weather is bad (not to your liking), it does not mean you are going to cancel your plan, focus all your attention to it or deny it. What you need to do is just accept the weather and adjust your plan accordingly.
As human beings, we have all kinds of emotions. Be it positive or negative but remember, bad weather is the cause of turbulence. You don’t want to create the storm in the office or at home and destroy all your relationships, do you?
“Take the positive learning and let go of negative emotions”
This NLP technique is great a tool to develop yourself awareness, to understand your own perception of how you see the world, build your empathy, understand others and train to see the objectives of the situation. Once you get the learning from different positions, it will be easy to let go of negative emotions from that event.
In position 1
- see the situation through your own eyes, as it is happening to you.
- Notice your own opinions, your view of the event and your values.
- What does it look like, sound like and feel like to you from your own perspective?
- What do you feel emotionally?
- What are your beliefs and expectations?
In position 2
- Take your shoes off. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes.
- How is that person thinking about the same situation?
- Imagine, what he feels about the situation he is in?
- What does it look like, sound like and feel like from his perspective?
- What are his beliefs and expectations?
In position 3
- Look at the situation from the observer’s view
- What do you observe about the relationship between the people in the position one and two?
- What new perspective do you get here?
- What are the common elements and expectations?
- What advice can you give them from your objective position?
Step back into your own shoes.
Notice what you have learned about yourself, the other person and the whole situation and ask……
- What new choices do you have now?
- What do you choose to feel now?
Try this method next time you feel a bit stuck in a sticky situation.